Coaching to Success

Our business is your success

Stress

STRESSED?!! Know the signs and how to help yourself

Sometimes it’s difficult to know whether the way we are feeling is down to stress or something else!

To start, have a look at the following to see if you recognise any of these symptoms in yourself or someone close:

Emotional symptoms

  • Frantic mind wishing it to quiet down, difficulty with relaxing
  • Agitated, frustrated and moody
  • Distant to those close. Unknowingly pushing near ones away
  • Feeling overwhelmed, losing control, worthless
  • Avoiding others.

Physical symptoms

  • Clenched jaw, teeth grinding, headaches
  • Insomnia
  • Nervous, shaking
  • Low energy
  • Frequent colds, infections
  • Raised Blood Pressure

The Health & Safety Executive report 10.4 million working days are lost with one in five visits to GPs associated with stress!

We are designed to deal with stress as a way of life. This can be positive if managed as it helps us remain alert. However, life can throw too much of it our way and this is how our bodies react so we need to be able to recognise these signs nature has been kind enough to give us!

Enough of the symptoms, how do we address them? As a director or senior manager, I have personally been subjected to more stress than should be allowed so I have empathy, actually no, sympathy to those who suffer. I was both physically and mentally strong but even I started to eventually recognise the traits and did something about it before drink or smoking took over!

There is no easy one-fix-all answers, however, try out the following and see which best fits you:

  • Share and Time it! – When you get home or meet your partner, set up a routine to dump the day’s activities. With a time against it, ie 1hr, for both to offload. Give yourself permission to accept it’s okay to stop worrying about things.
  • What’s the cause? – One you recognise your own stress warning signs from above symptoms, look to see what’s causing them (Starting a new project, reports to be written, the next blog such as this, lol, items at home.
  • Own your feeling ~ Take control – How often does your mood change because someone else has ruined your happy time by careless comments? You own the direction of driving your emotional car, avoid giving someone else the keys! Where others are concerned, assess how they make you feel and what you need to make your mood change. Accept areas out of your control for what it is, YOU can’t change it, allow yourself to accept it. This will help reduce stress.
  • Relax and/or Meditate – Give yourself permission to take time out of everyday life. This truly helps as another means of disconnecting. Listen to some music, read a book, listen to a meditative audio track (something we offer), consider yoga! Try to set aside time daily for an activity, rather than becoming a slave to tasks. Even just 5-10 minutes breaks to simply breathe and think of all the pleasures you have around you while releasing negative thoughts helps!
  • Scheduled To-do list – Stress can be reduced by creating a timeframe to complete a given task therein. This may be considered an addition rather than a release of stress, however, people who set themselves a time limit, focus on when they start and finish with a much better chance of achieving their objective.
  • Mistakes happen – The stress of perfectionism adds to the pile! Learn from your mistakes, embrace them and take what benefits you can from this. This is also often related to confidence issues and mastering the fact that we are not robots gives us freedom to relax, reducing stress levels.
  • Don’t try to please all! – A boss, friend, neighbour always comes to you because you’re always willing to help. Is there someone else who can help that request normally thrown in your direction? Sit back, negotiate what is really important to YOU with those that aren’t.

These are just a handful of areas Coaching to Success can help and we hope this brings about an awareness if nothing else. Stress, if not recognised and managed, can lead into some really dark places, recognising the signs is the first step.

Should you be looking to move forward in Work or Life, take the first step by contacting Neil on 07761 187238 or email neil@coachingtosuccess.co.uk and if you’re online, have a look at his interview video at https://youtu.be/RvCwOL4hPco where you’ll be assured a warm welcome to discuss how we can help.

Business challenges … which of these do you recognise?

It’s been a hard few years with many businesses rising from the ashes of the 2008 crash. From lack of jobs or redundancies, from renting to having a new home choosing different types of paint finishes, new and fresh companies are still being formed and for these as well as existing companies that forged through the hardships like availing online personal loans for bad credit, a larger challenge is still being undertaken in as much as maintaining the business like having a Trauma rehab center, and etc.

I have found the following 3 attributes the hardest to manage so thought I would share my findings!

FINANCIAL MANAGEMENT

‘Cash is King’ and Cash Flow is critical. As business starts to pick up, well managed cash flow is tantamount for success. If not already established, get on board with an accountant who can help with bookkeeping and all other aspects of financial control.

It’s not simply about money coming in and going out, seek advice and in the early days, if managing your accounts yourself, seek areas you can improve and as you grow, concentrate on what you do best and hand over this side of the business to someone else.

EXHAUSTION

The pressure to succeed, the variety of tasks and hours put in can eventually wear down the fittest of individuals when trying to start a business! Even when the business is successful, still those hours are ploughed in … but there can be a breaking point.

So look to take time out. Share this with Family or Friends, take positive breaks away from work and refrain from checking in … make it a break! Fatigue takes its toll and can lead to impulsive decisions that may affect both the business and people therein, so rest is essential!

I’ll often go for a walk during a lunch time to get a mental break from what I’m working on, giving me a physical activity which also stimulates positive endorphins that exercise releases.

Yes, the hours need to be put in at the formation but as it picks up, offset some of the rewards to other avenues such as bookkeeping, telemarketing, admin work on a temporary basis to begin but take time out. This is vital for the continuation, without replenishment of air in car tyres, the car will eventually come to a halt probably due to a crash!

EGGS & BASKETS

We start off, get a great client, then really focus on insuring we look after them well. Consequently both theirs and our business’ expand and all is well! As they grow there’s a chance they may move to someone else, so, now what?

I’ve seen this happen frequently throughout my career. Diversity is key to success and growth. I understand how difficult it is especially when you feel committed to this wonderful client/customer who not only pays well but on time too!

So continue to expand your client portfolio. Look to consider where potential new bloodlines can be created from. What are your Unique Selling Points to attract new clients/customers? As before, get someone in to help, maybe a marketing company but always look for the next potential!

 

Coaching to success help businesses and individuals to think logically, pragmatically and laterally when it comes to finding the best way of moving forward and retaining both the mental and physical energy to see it through. If you or any members of your team are showing any of the above traits, contact Neil on 07761 187238 or email neil@coachingtosuccess.co.uk and if you’re online, have a look at his interview video at https://youtu.be/RvCwOL4hPco

 

The art of just getting on with it

With the full knowledge a deadline was looming to write this feature, other ‘Little’ jobs that needed to be completed consistently remained in focus because I wasn’t clear on what it was I needed to write about

Funny really, I was procrastinating as well as hiding away from the task in hand. And then I took my own advice and set about following one or two of the following

How many times have you found yourself in a similar situation where you know you have a project to start, a job that needs to be done or something needs to be prepared but you aren’t clear on what it is so we find ‘warranted’ distractions that take us away (justifiably, of course!) from what really needs to be addressed

We’re all fallible, so such things happen to even us who should know better but it affects us differently. Much like I did here, you can learn to recognise it, then address it with the help of such methods that now follow.

  1. TIME-MATRIX – Steven Covey’s matrix is a 2×2 square. Along the top is ‘Urgent’ (Left) and ‘Not Urgent’ (Right). Down the side is ‘Important’ (Top) and ‘Not Important’ (Bottom). In each quadrant , asses what is Important/Urgent (Manage), Important/Not Urgent (Focus), Not Important/Urgent (Avoid) or Not Important/Not Urgent (Avoid)
  2. CARTESIAN QUADRANT – Similar to above, this time, along the top (a) If you do make that change & (b) if you don’t make that change. Along the side, (c) will happen & (d) won’t Once drawn, this will help give a much clearer picture of importance to focus on this or any other area where a decision needs to be made.
  3. EMAILS – Turn off warnings that an email had arrived. Helping to avoid the temptation to continually check each and every new one.
  4. MONOTASK SETTING – Focus on one task at a time. Although ‘Emergencies’ may arise, can you assess their urgency? Do they all need to be done NOW?
  5. PROCRASTINATION – Guide your wandering thoughts back to where or what you are doing. If thoughts drift, acknowledge what you’re doing and a little self-talk of getting back onto the item in hand.
  6. STOP JUGGLING – You will inevitably be drawn back into to quagmire of multitasking and when you do, take a short break from everything! Allow your mind to re-focus, the stress levels to reduce and concentration to reframe itself.
  7. PRIORITISE – If you are clear as to what is truly urgent as opposed to preferring to do, this will help with the focus too.

These are but a few ideas to help you get back on track. There are others that will also help and this is where a coach can help you to gain focus and meet the objectives, in the meantime, address these and see how you get on.

Coaching to Success’ director, Neil Nutburn, welcomes your enquiries if you are struggling with juggling all those tasks or, as above, avoiding the ones that need to be completed. Contact Neil on 07761 187238 or email neil@coachingtosuccess.co.uk and if you’re online, have a look at his interview video at https://youtu.be/RvCwOL4hPco

 

How can we make decision easier?

Some decisions are easily made, others have many connotations due to complexity of people involved, too many options or the need but not necessarily the ‘want’ when it comes to having to make a decision.

Decision making is primarily based around problem solving so now you are considering two elements. If you look at your daily routine, you’ll find you are constantly making, just not really acknowledging it as it becomes routine.

However, once we drift from familiarity, we encounter uncertainty where the decision you make may have a major impact on life, business or other people.

I believe we’re all capable of making decisions once we develop complete confidence in our abilities. So, to help that process, consider the following ‘5 point implementation plan’ next time you have that unfamiliar but all important decision to make.

Positive Environment

Look to what the benefits will be as a result of making that decision. Where there are others involved in the process, encourage the positive features and also their contribution.

Get the facts first

All too often I see people trying to make decisions simply based on apparently saving money (upfront costs at least).

Gain all the facts first. For example, if choosing between suppliers, compare hidden charges, perhaps an annual rebate structure or how reliable are they? I once lost a 500m2 order for plasterboard to a rival company because they were 1p/m2 cheaper. I later discovered they had turned up 3hrs later with 6 guys on site waiting! That was a payment of 18hrs skilled labour for a saving of £5! You do the maths.

Check out the options

Insure you have looked at all the alternatives whether it be a product, a service or a process. Explore what alternatives there are by using those around you.

From here consider implications of each along with risks and practicality … insure the solution matches the objective and funds can match both.

Select the best

If the answer is still vague with each option having its benefits, create a ‘decision matrix’. A simple tool that removes the emotional attachment of decision making. Draw a matrix with options going from top to bottom down the right side. Along the top from left to right, the criteria required to be met. Along each option, give a rating from 0 to 10 under each criteria and on the far right, total up.

Whichever scores the highest will prove to be the best overall option.

Once done … walk away and do nothing! Return a day later to re-examine or, if an urgent decision is required, still walk away for a short while and return with fresh eyes to re-evaluate what has been decided.

Announce and proceed

Put on your inspirational hat and go out there to inform all those who will be affected by this new decision.

If there is a team of people involved, encourage them to participate, giving them elements to control and be responsible for. Insure they know how important they are to the overall success of this decision, give them ownership.

Coaching to Success’ director, Neil Nutburn, welcomes your enquiries if you are considering change but unsure the best way of moving yourself or your business forward. Darwin wrote “It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change”. So for those who endorse the evolution of moving forward by making decisions, contact Neil on 07761 187238 or email neil@coachingtosuccess.co.uk.

How do you handle rejection in business?

We all know rejection can be hard to handle and in services such as mine, where the open minded can see the benefits that a good coach can bring but some can’t, therefore, rejection is an element of moving forward for me and especially where people don’t really understand the benefits on offer.

You can’t avoid rejection whether it be in relationships, life or work but the positive is that it helps with development and self-education as you identify areas for adaptation and change.

More often than not though, it is the feeling that affects our emotions and emotions aren’t logical, so let’s put some rationality into the equation.

  1. Don’t take it personally – ‘Personally’ is an emotional state and often rejection makes us feel as if it is ourselves that is under attack. Self-doubt creeps in, ‘How could I have presented it better?’, ‘What went wrong?’, ‘Why didn’t they like me?’

Now look at it differently – what was it about the proposal/idea that was rejected?

Frequently it’s not about the person but the offering that is being rejected yet we apply rejection to our thoughts and they in turn connect to emotions! It’s often a simple case that what is being proposed doesn’t meet the criteria so take yourself out of the equation and then re-assess the situation.

  1. Focus on control – Those with Internal Focus believe they have control over what happens in their lives. Those with External Focus believe it’s others, chance or even fate that have control. So decide whether you will allow others to influence the way you feel or take control of it yourself.

This may sound a tad harsh but maybe it needs to be said to ourselves!

  1. Learn – Look at this logically and learn from the rejection. Whether it was simply a case of the presentation could have been better or not matching the recipient’s needs etc., gather ‘facts’.

If you can establish what the reason was (removing emotion!) for the rejection, you will be able to improve thereafter. Carry out a self-analysis of areas you believe contributed to the rejection.

Better still, don’t make assumptions, ask! Make it clear you have accepted the rejection but in wishing to learn from this experience ask what didn’t work for them. You may be surprised to find out how freely the recipient will be in giving you this information (if you’re willing to ask).

I have been dumbfounded on occasions with reasons that I simply wouldn’t have even considered. I have certainly been educated in not to assume!

In business, rejection is part of day to day activities. Your resilience to deal with it, learn from it and take action on your new found knowledge is the key.

As that old expression goes, you can please some of the people some of the time… so it’s not all about you as a person but more likely a mismatch between what or how you are making the offering and not an assault on you or your emotions!

Coaching to Success helps you find yourself, give support and offers clarity to what you are aiming to achieve with the means of getting there. For further information, simply call Neil on 07761 187238 or email neil@coachingtosuccess.co.uk for an informal conversation to see how we can help increase your Locus of control or other matters concerning business development.